Wednesday, February 7, 2018

Dear God, how can it be that my small closet, dark and safe, can turn so easily from a refuge into a bringer of panic? Yesterday I sat in this same space, protected from glare. Today, the gloom grows into a set of beasts. I fear how vulnerable I am.

Such a child, picking my way through a world I barely understand. I hide behind a sapling with my eyes closed and imagine I am unseen. A few steps later a stray shadow threatens as if to attack.

Lord! Let me put away my pretending. You have sent me to gather the other children, not to distract myself with play in this interior land.

I have frightened myself. The others may well be equally so. Let me nudge them awake from their nightmare imaginings, as you have done for me.

Let me remember, O Lord: I am awake.

(Letter #1124)