Saturday, October 20, 2018

Dear God, I mouth these words: love, love. Acceptance. Thy will. But how forthrightly do I mean them? In truth, lurking within me even amidst my prayers, is a selfish intent. I say I seek your will, dear Lord, yet always it is on my own terms.

Let me see the unfolding world as complete in itself. Your will is already expressed, regardless of whether I may seek to aid or hinder it. Alignment of my will with yours is of benefit to me, not you, dear Lord.

Lord, when I say, Love, let me mean it to my core. When I abandon my own will, let me do so utterly, with no reserve.

Let me burn my ships in the harbor, dismantle the bridge behind me, burn through my last ounce of fuel! I know and feel your support when my need is stark.

Now, Lord, let me turn my attention to small things and bring the same attitude of desperation. Let me depend upon you completely, even to guide me through the day’s minutiae.

Let me not struggle, no, not even against the gentlest reins.

(Letter #1379)