Entwined with my life.

Do my circumstances affect my quality of life, or does my quality of life affect my circumstances? Does outer drive inner, or does inner drive outer?

I tidy these rooms, dust and polish the furniture. While satisfying, this does little to advance my willingness to our due your will. I am too busy thinking of the satisfaction I will feel over neat surroundings.

I forgot that the outside conditions are a reflection of my inner life.

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Let me attend to my connection with you, Lord, and become willing to pursue your will in all things.

Let my spiritual life grow, and let my physical life follow.

– from the mountain

Consider:

Can I focus on inner growth, even when outer conditions are difficult?

Reading:

“Everything we see hides another thing; we always want to see what is hidden by what we see.” — René Magritte

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“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” — W. B. Yeats

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“Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.” — Psalm 51:10 (KJV)

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Always pursuing.

Will I find what I seek, or does the seeking set it outside of my grasp?

I strive and pursue, chasing after a banner, always a step away and behind. A desperation of my own making, for I can stop chasing.

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What if I sit, Lord, and let the day come to me? What will be revealed? Will the empty part of me, finally, be filled?

Let me live today untroubled by these coursing desires, Lord. Let me live without striving and pursuing wholeness.

– from the mountain

Consider:

Can I cease grasping?

Reading:

“Hurry ruins saints as well as artists.” — Thomas Merton

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“From craving springs grief, from craving springs fear; for him who is free from craving there is no grief, whence fear?” — Dhammapada 216

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“Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him.” — Psalm 37:7 (KJV)

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Wherefrom?

Wherefrom comes this ball of worry that greets me this morn? My dwelling is tidy, my chores complete, my body healthy. And yet my heart races and my belly is tight.

Is this how I respond to having obligations, Lord? Yesterday’s work is done, but I have chores this day. Would my heart be calm if I had nothing that must be done?

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Grant me a willing heart, Lord, that I may approach this day with equanimity.

– from the mountain

Consider:

Can I have more equanimity in the face of worry?

Reading:

“Let everything happen to you: beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.” — Rainer Maria Rilke

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“Today I escaped from anxiety. Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions — not outside.” — Marcus Aurelius

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“Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.” — Philippians 4:6 (KJV).

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Can I see it?

One table leg is too short, after weeks of painstaking work on the lathe. Perversely, I want to fasten it and be done. The wobbling table would announce the deficiency.

The fall grounds are beautiful, garnering praise from neighbors. Perversely, I want to take credit. I did nothing to cause the leaves to turn so splendidly.

Is the truth a bitter pill? Or is it a balm when seen rightly?

I can shorten the other legs. I can simply say “they are indeed beautiful.”

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I can see the truth without shrinking away from it, for it unlocks the door to seeing and doing your will.

Let me see truth, Lord.

– from the mountain

Consider:

Can I open my eyes, and truly see?

Reading:

“Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth.” — Henry David Thoreau

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“The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable.” — James A. Garfield

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“And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” — John 8:32

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