Monday, February 5, 2018

Dear God, I awaken, I stand, I stride out into the wilderness to face all manner of challenge and tribulation. Battles and tests. Dangers. My anxious heart trembles in this quiet hour of preparation. Will I conquer or be vanquished? Will I survive or will I be struck down?

My worries are all for nought, for this view I hold is just a phantasm. There is no wilderness; I have no enemy forces arrayed against me. No beasts poised to attack. In my distorted self-imaginings, I am the hero in an epic. But no: I am a child, preoccupied with acting out my made-up adventures.

In fact the wilderness is a garden you have built with care. The fraught byway, simply a walking path. The enemies, just a knot of eager playmates. Me, a toddler reeling around in this child’s garden.

Every stone and leaf you have placed before me, O Lord. All here for a reason, to make this child into an adult.

Lord, let these fantasies drop from my eyes. Let me approach these lessons as a pupil, eager to unlock what they have to teach.

(Letter #1122)