Dear God, purify me. Burn away all my character defects; leave behind some semblance of whom I ought to be. Take away all that would offend you.
I am so keenly aware of my shortcomings today. My pride and arrogance, my irresponsibility, my selfishness, my sloth. Lord, let me be willing to behave as if these things had been removed. Let me become willing that I might be improved.
Achieving such willingness does not come easily. My natural state is fundamentally imperfect, willfully so. And while I may imagine myself willing to improve, am I really? The test is to what extent am I acting contrary to my defects? I admit this is not frequent. Much more often, I behave selfishly, slothfully, pridefully. And yet the pain of my imperfection remains my constant companion. When will it be enough? When will you see fit to relieve me?
God, let me accept your timing in this. Let me do my part, and become entirely willing to be whom you would have me be. Take away the defects that stand in the way of my usefulness to you and to my fellows.
(Letter #914)
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